English!? What.The.Hell?!

I was assigned to teach English to 9 old ladies.. (go on and laugh)

To be clearer, 9 old ladies living with cancer...

Yeah well, its part of the volunteer program...
Ok.... Maybe not, because I've not seen anything related about teaching new language to cancer patients in the volunteer program list...
It just happened on one random day, when I was waiting (innocently, really had no idea what was coming.. ) in the office, waiting for the nurses to finish registering new members for the Palliative Care society. Suddenly, Dr.Boon emerged.. from.. out of nowhere.. with 9 old, and chatty ladies. She introduced those ladies to me.. and I said.."Hi, Nice to meet you"... and the next thing I know is:

 This is Jasmine, and she's going to teach you English. 

I can feel my smile.. literally froze on the spot.. and deep down under... I was swearing and cursing in a language that me, myself don't even know.

What?! The. Hell. 

I don't even know how to handle my 5 year old hyperactive sister.. and now I have to face 9 old ladies....with disease.. and some of them speak Chinese and Cantonese, Only Chinese and Cantonese and nothing but Chinese and Cantonese.. God help me please.
My Chinese has gone from a Grade C to fail, and don't get me started with Cantonese... Whenever, I speak canto.. my friends laughed. THEY LAUGH.. right into my face... That's how bad it is.
Not to mention, that the English language I speak, is a mixture of everything in it.. I think I'm gonna turn them into a real, complete Malaysian and not a good English speaker.. I can just start praying to every religion's God now..

&; the news got from.. worst.. to.. a disaster..
We are having 2 lessons every week.. for a month..
Where the hell can I dig out that much of English lesson for them??

So my weekend was plunged into a deep state of fear and anxiety..

BUT. when Tuesday came... the whole thing turn out to be fine... ok, it wasn't just fine... it was.... very..supercalifragilisticexpialidocious-ly(say it loud, say it twice, say it fast as the speed of light!)
splendid.

The first lesson was about "How to Introduce Yourself"  (I actually wrote that on the board)..
&; taught them what to say in a situation where they meet new people.. and it turns out.. better than I thought... THEY ACTUALLY UNDERSTOOD ME! while I thought I was spilling baby crap at them.....

So, they really did enjoyed themselves... and now they even know how to sing "You are my Sunshine" ... IN TUNE SOME MORE!!... I can see myself flying already..

I think I somehow manage to plant some basic English greetings in them because now, they couldn't stop saying "Hi How are you? Nice to Meet You!" .. and that's it. That's the only thing they know..

Wow. This is. An Achievement. for me..

and improvement for them....

I'm so proud!